Monday, September 28, 2009


I always find it interesting what gets my mind going.

I was very saddened yesterday at church to find out a dear friend of mine had miscarried. They weren't trying, it was a "pill baby" the attachment for that child forms so quickly, though. I instantly felt all those emotions stirred from when that very same thing happened to me. I wish no one would have to go through that ever. Yet, I believe that it things like these that shape those of us who do into who we are based on how we respond to it.

I still miss those twins that I only saw once on an ultrasound. I still wish I had gotten a picture to "remember" them with and so Kenny could have seen them too. Kenny and I still wonder what they would have been and who they would have become. It's been 2 years now since being pregnant and miscarrying with them - and yet I still get sad about it - even though I know Rylee would not have come to be if that pregnancy had been healthy.

We wouldn't trade our second pill baby for the world. She is such a joy to us. Today she has been in just a happy go lucky mood - even went to sleep almost smiling. Laughing at the stupid things I do and wanting me to pay attention and play with her. We always wonder about our other 2, though, and cannot wait to meet them someday.

Kenny is going out of town for the next 4 days. It'll be interesting. He's not been gone that long in quite awhile. He wasn't too happy about finding out about it today. Usually he gets more advanced warning to prepare for it.

In the meantime Rylee'll be sleeping with me for the rest of the week because I don't like to go to bed alone. Heehee.


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